6 Months…and Big News!

I can’t believe it has been six months since my diagnosis…I couldn’t imagine this day 6 months ago but am so grateful for all who have sent well wishes, prayers and support. I can’t say enough how you all kept me going. I appreciate it more than words can say!

I had my 6 week follow-up appointment and all is well so far with radiation. I celebrated my 6 month diagnosis anniversary by getting an ECHO to check out how my heart is after chemo and getting my port flushed…lots of needles and no fun \ but, on the bright side my hair, eyebrows and eyelashes are coming back in nicely. I can already see a curl/wave in my hair so it should be interesting to see what it comes out like…I look like I have a buzz cut now….see….

I also have gotten more active and have started playing volleyball with the “Boob Crew” and I ran the FatAss 5k about a week ago! We had a blast, we were the keyword of the day because who doesn’t just want to yell out “Booooooobs” when you see a group of people with it on their shirts haha….our group won “best dressed group” and we won a bottle of Fat Ass tequila…so much fun! Plus I met about 5 other survivors just from people coming up and asking about my journey…very inspirational day!

And  now for the BIG NEWS!!! Sorry to keep everyone waiting but, I am starting my own charity for young cancer survivors with a fellow survivor friend of mine, Angie Daniels, and it will be called “Generation Stronger”

We will be offering services for other young cancer survivors as well as support groups for numerous types of cancer, not just breast, I bought the domain, started a website and am working on the paperwork to be certified as a not-for-profit….reaching out to other survivors means a great deal to Angie and I and has helped us get through this past year. It’s true what they say, as a cancer survivor you are initiated into a fraternity, not necessarily one you want to be a part of but one you are destined for. Please keep an eye out for our first events )

I also have been approved as an iPicture Hope photographer. I can now offer breast cancer survivors and fighters a free photo session! Here are the details:

I am so excited to be able to offer this to fellow fighters and survivors because in a time when everything is being taken away from you, the only way to get through it is embrace yourself and realize you ARE beautiful!

Sisterhood

From the very beginning of my journey I have witnessed and benefited from this new sisterhood I have joined, not by my choice but by fate. From members of my church introducing me to a fellow fighter that little did I know would have a huge impact on how I handled myself through treatment, to being that person that someone calls or messages with questions because they found something unusual that needed to be checked out by a doctor. I have come in contact with some of the most amazing women that I know we will have that bond that can only be had by those who have been there before.

Never underestimate the power of a compliment or random act of kindness. I have encountered this new “fraternity” out and about while sporting my lock-less do. People can’t help but notice and when you’ve been there you can’t help but want to hug them or give them a “You go girl!” I know it’s helped me when I was most self-conscious and I know I will pass it on even when my hair comes back.

I now have friends all over the country because of my cancer. It took away a lot of me but it has given me great friends which I hope to meet someday. Angie is a mom in Torie’s class that had just finished her reconstruction when I was diagnosed. It’s sad to think we would not have met if it weren’t for my situation. Collette from church is truly an angel sent to me. She went through the same exact treatment I did so it was nice to know what to expect and have a guide through the process. Anne Embry is a woman in Louisiana that was diagnosed on the same day I was, has a little girl just like me and finished chemo about the same time. Karla is a woman in Colorado who I have become pen pals (via facebook) with who is undergoing chemo right now. And the list continues to grow as more and more women hear my story and reach out for help and answers. I feel privileged to be that person for many women at a time when nothing seems to make sense.

I felt that so much this past weekend. Angie and I took a trip to Chicago for Fab Fest 2012 put on by Bright Pink which is an organization to education and promote pro-active lifestyle changes and early detection for young women who are either at risk or know someone who has been affected by  breast cancer. Not to mention it was hosted by Giuliana Rancic. Giuliana had her mastectomy on December 13th and I had mine on December 9th so it was encouraging to know I was fighting along side her.  Her strength is inspiring! We had a blast and even got to meet her. Thank you to everyone who donated and made this possible! Angie and I are going to work at bringing Bright Pink to Springfield because we both felt if we were more educated, our experiences would have been even a little less shocking and we would have been more prepared. To be faces of breast cancer is to let others know that it doesn’t matter how old you are, you can get it at any age……unfortunately……

We got to meet her and I realized that the person I was emailing back and forth with was the founder of Bright Pink, Lindsey Avner! We got to share our stories with Giuliana and she made sure to make time for us (as they were rushing her off to Yoga!). She hugged us multiple times and thanked us for being there and was shocked at how young we were going through what she went through. She hung around all day and Bill even came out mid-day to support her. Of course the camera crews and mics were everywhere for their reality show so it was verry surreal, but cool! I am very proud to be a part of bright pink and hope to start a chapter in Springfield!

My Upcoming Endeavors

Well, now that I am feeling better my focus can return on enjoying my life and helping impact the lives of others! I had a great weekend supporting some great causes! Friday we went to support the Power of Pink team in their road to fundraising for komen for the cure. They had a girls night out at a local restaurant and boy was it fun! I connected with a lot of new people and caught up with some people I already knew…it was a great night and hopefully they raised some money!

Then we headed over to Erin’s Pavillion to see one of my favorite bands the Remedy Rock for Peace to benefit the victims of crime garden that will be built in the park. We held up the dance floor and it felt good to just dance like I used to and not stop! I felt a little like my old self again!

I raised enough money to go to Fab Fest 2012 in Chicago on the 15th of April along with another survivor friend of mine. I hope to meet Giuliana Rancic and share that we went through our mastectomies at about the same time. Plus, I will hopefully get to see some of my old Chicago friends! Should be a good weekend.

My cousin recently nominated me for the MLB Honorary Bat Girl contest…of course for the cubbies! If you have some time please click here and go to cubs and my story is under the name “Kelly” (that’s my cousins name that nominated me) but just look for my photo and you can find me! I have never been to a cubs game and I would be honored at the Mother’s Day game so it would be a lot of fun and hopefully would give me another chance to get my story out to young women out there and be another face of breast cancer.

I signed up my team for volleyball at four seasons. This year we are called the “Boob Crew” and our shirts say “boobs” on the front with the pink ribbon and on the back says “they could use your support” along with my blog website, so hopefully this will gain us some awareness. I fully intend on bringing a bucket for donations so I can start raising my money for Making Strides Against Breast Cancer this fall. I opened up the orders for everyone of my friends on facebook and sold close to 50 shirts! There’s going to be Boob Shirts worn all around Springfield and Chicago!! haha LOVE IT!

Also, in October I know I said that I wanted to do some sort of fundraiser celebrating the local survivors and I think I found a partner in crime to help me pull it off! We are working out the details but let me just say it’s going to be a TON of fun, and totally my kind of event! )

Fundraising and Getting Physical!

Well, now that I have my computer back it’s much easier to post! I have been raising funds for Fab Fest 2012 in Chicago on April 15th…I have raised my $500 but am helping my mom raise hers…the money goes to Bright Pink which is an organization that helps young women at high risk for breast and ovarian cancer with education and prevention. This group now includes my little sister and daughter so this is a cause that is very near and dear to me. The Bright Pink girls reached out to me in the very beginning of my fight to offer any help. It was vey comforting and I can at least raise money for this cause. Plus I would love to go to the event in Chicago and meet Giuliana Rancic who had her mastectomy only a few days after I had mine. Please consider donating anything by clicking this link

http://www.stayclassy.org/fundraise?fcid=192303

I also have decided to run the Fat Ass 5k here in Springfield on May 12th. It’s a fairly casual race as they feed you along the route so I figure I can keep up a bit. I started running and working out again this week and it feels great to do something for myself again. I even found an old photo of me from my freshman year of college and have put it up on the fridge as inspiration. Funny I used to think that was fat….now 50lbs heavier I wish I could be that again haha! One of those things I wish I knew then what I know now. )

BRAC2

Well, I just found out that I am BRAC2 positive…which means I carry the cancer gene. Now it means I am more prone to ovarian cancer as well as other cancers. So now the question is whether I remove my ovaries to avoid the issue…this is probably the hardest news I had to hear. Knowing that I will hopefully be able to have kids again in the future is what still keeps me going. Now that hope is under attack. I choose to focus on my faith to get me through it and if I am meant to be blessed with another child, He will make that decision. If Torie is the only child I will carry then I am very thankful she came out the way she is….perfect.

Now this means that my first line family members are at risk as well…for pancreatic cancer as well as breast and ovarian. Little did I realize that men are affected by this gene as well. So now, both my parents and siblings are at risk. However, I am soooooooo very thankful that this was found with me and I had to go through this because now it means the rest of my family’s health will be watched very carefully and nothing will be missed if it does happen to any of them.

Needless to say I have a lot of very mixed feelings about this result and am choosing to focus on the life I have rather than the medically involved life I know me and my family will have for the rest of our lives.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

FINALLY!! I am feeling close to normal! Taxol is way nicer to me than the AC was…I slept through the treatment and even was hungry once I got home! I have been a little achy (body aches, like the flu), but that was a new side effect they told me about so it was expected. The Wednesday before my treatment I went to the American Cancer Society’s program called Look Better Feel Better and brought my mom along with me…it was a lot of fun! Luckily we had a fun group of gals and kept the laughter coming. It was basically a skin care class with donated items from miscellaneous skin care companies. I am very loyal to my Mary Kay but when I started chemo I couldn’t use the skin care anymore because my skin had changed so much, so this was a way to try some different items without having to pay for them upfront. I was very happy to see some Mary Kay in the bags though! Gotta love any company supporting women in this situation. I met some amazing women that are going through what I am and even made a chemo buddy….turns out we had chemo the same day that week. Plus we have all the same doctors haha…needless to say I was the youngest there and the room gasped when the presenter asked how old I was…it’s just a reminder that we young women going through this need to make our presence known because otherwise the issue gets put by the wayside. I am making a choice to go to more support groups not only for myself but for others currently going through this and that will go through this in the future!

I have been able to act more normal lately…the next day after my treatment I had a day out shopping with mom and celebrated my best friend’s birthday. I got a couple wigs and we had a blast…it was nice to start feeling normal again and doing normal things. I am excited for the spring weather and to be able to start  living my life again and this time with a whole new perspective.

 

Halfway Point

Well, Friday is my halfway point with chemo. Luckily it is my last AC (nauseating treatment) so I am hoping that I won’t be down as long with the latter treatments. 4 more to go and then 6 weeks of radiation is what it looks like. I had another “expansion” in my reconstruction process on Wednesday and since the scar tissue is setting in oh boy has it been painful!! I am very close to my normal size again and once I get there, they will want to stretch me further so the implants will look more natural. Once radiation is complete I will get the expanders swapped out for implants. So weird to think of having implants…normally me and my friends would joke about plastic surgery, but when it’s necessary you look at it a whole different way. I love my plastic surgeon, too. She is such an upbeat and fun person. I tend to joke about a lot of stuff in my situation to avoid crying about it and she totally gets it and jokes along with me. So I love going to see her because she does take her job seriously but makes sure I feel comfortable and relaxed. Love you Dr. Bergman!!

Unfortunately I found out this week that breast cancer runs in my family. My aunt was just diagnosed. We don’t know a lot about how far along and such yet, we just know she has it. I remember that feeling and wish I could just hug her and not let go, but she lives in Texas. She has an MRI and meets with the surgeon tomorrow. We always had a sort of special bond. Even though she didn’t live close, she would come and visit or watch us while my parents were on vacation and we would spend the afternoons doing arts and crafts. She is the creative and artsy aunt so I always had fun with her. I will never forget at her daughter (cousin Becky’s) wedding doing a polka dance to “Come on Eileen” and we were the only ones on the dance floor. So at my wedding I had the DJ play it and dedicate it to her haha! Now that my grandma on my dad’s side has survived it and now with my aunt’s diagnosis I definitely am going to look into the BRACA testing (genetic test). It is looking like it runs in the gene pool. So scared that my daughter now will be at high risk her entire life and will always be looking over her shoulder. Praying for clarity and strength in that department!

I am getting more used to being bald. I even left the house accidentally without my hat. Luckily we were just going to the movie store on the north end, but I freaked out halfway there realizing my head was naked haha. Oh well! Once it warms up a bit more I will probably go bald a bit more. It’s just more comfortable, maybe not for the onlooker but for me!

So excited to start feeling more normal again. My stomach is a wreck and all last week got heart burn no matter what I ate or drank. Hoping that will subside because you all know how much I love to cook and eat! haha I am getting busier in my business as wedding season approaches so being down for a week really throws me off. But, I love all my clients that are soooo patient with me and understanding. I never know how my days will go. Last Thursday I started off the day feeling great and by the evening I was praying to the porcelin god! So it means a lot that they understand if I need a day to rest or what. I am tired of sitting on the couch and enjoy getting out and having a life outside of my cancer treatments. I have met so many amazing people and can’t wait to actually spend time with them spreading the word of awareness! I didn’t understand what awareness was until I was diagnosed. This is what God has in plan for me. To be a testament of His love and my faith in Him to be my strength through all of this. To let young women be aware of what it is they are really looking for and that you are never too young to get cancer. I know there are many out there who were even younger that I was but I feel it’s my duty to be a spokeswoman for those who either can’t talk about it or prefer not to. There has to be good that comes out of this and I feel I am in charge of spreading that “good.”

Love you all! I will keep you posted on my endeavors!